[FanFic] Making the wrong choice

[Amazee Dayzee]

I do enjoy how this update has came out! Really great job on it!

[Buster]

Much of the drive back was spent in relative silence, Bishop busy enjoying his new rawhide bone while Joel was focused on the road. That actually hadn't gone as badly as he'd expected. Snowball had been about as jealous as he'd expected, but Boomer's quick acceptance despite their interesting introduction had been a relief, and well, his aunt and uncle had a rather hard time saying no to a face that cute.

As they continued down the highway Joel's thoughts drifted towards Ripley. The conversation he'd had with snow had reminded him that they'd never actually found out what happened to the other dog.

Elswhere...

"DAAAAAAAAAAAAD! I'M BORED AND BEANIE'S BEING WIERD!"
"FOR THE LAST TIME THAT'S NOT HOW YOU PRONOUNCE IT!"

cringing at all the barking, the Human sitting on his couch grumbled, "Max, remind me again, why on earth did I think bringing her home was a good idea?"

"How should I know."

Just kidding, real post will be up later.

[Amazee Dayzee]

I can't wait to see how you have done the real post! This part of the story is really great!

[Buster]

Much of the drive back was spent in relative silence, Bishop busy enjoying his new rawhide bone while Joel was focused on the road. That actually hadn't gone as badly as he'd expected. Snowball had been about as jealous as he'd expected, but Boomer's quick acceptance despite their interesting introduction had been a relief, and well, his aunt and uncle had a rather hard time saying no to a face that cute.

As they continued down the highway Joel's thoughts drifted towards Ripley. The conversation he'd had with snow had reminded him that they'd never actually found out what happened to the other dog.

Elswhere...

Kasidy had hoped that a new playmate would help with her beloved pup's chronic nervousness... instead it had just led to the poor girl showing that same nervous tic and fake smile at home. This was a mistake, what am I going to do? This is only making things worse...

Sighing, she got up from her seat, and started heading for the other room. She had already put this off for weeks. Feeling guilty for bringing the young corgi into her home for such a selfish reason, then wanting to send her away when it didn't work... But delaying more wasn't going to make things better, or make the guilt go away...

As she got close to the girls' room, she could hear talking from the other side of the door.

"I know you don't like to talk much, I don't really expect an answer... But I just wanted to say, It's really fun having you as a big sister. I'm glad I came here."

Why did I have to hear her say that... This is already hard enough... Kasidy paused, stopping short of the door, cringing.

"I... I'm glad you're here too..."

Did she just... Did my Daisy just talk to another pet? Hands now clasped over her mouth in an atempt to muffle any sound she might make, as the first sign of tears began to show.

"Daisy... Did you-"
"Uh huh."

Maybe this wasn't a waste...
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Yeah, Daisy's lack of personality has bugged me for a while now. I HAD to do something about that.
So... now she's a dog with a creepy fake smile who doesn't talk cause of anxiety... not sure that's an improvement or not but it's at least a change from 'walking video game reference'.

[The-J-Man]

well that was a pleasant surprise! I cant help but wonder what Daisy's voice would sound like if we heard it.

[Mickey]

I always heard Princess Peach when reading Daisy's dialogue.

[Buster]

well that was a pleasant surprise! I cant help but wonder what Daisy's voice would sound like if we heard it.

When she's not doing the fake smile and forced sounding greeting, I kinda picture her as one of those characters who barely talks above a whisper. meanwhile her repetitions of "Hi, I'm Daisy!" are a normal volume and tone, but stilted slightly. Just a bit, off, like her smile.

[Amazee Dayzee]

I just heard Daisy's MKDD voice when I read Daisy's lines.

[dryideabat]

I can definitely see Daisy being like this and I like it. I mean, there was this one time she was seen without that big creepy grin. https://www.housepetscomic.com/2009/04/ ... ery-naive/

[Amazee Dayzee]

But we didn't hear what she was saying. We only saw her waving. She could have been saying the same thing.

[Buster]

Okay, this is kinda frustrating... i need the "Joel at college" scenes to establish what Bishop is like and how he and joel interact, but i'm stumped as to what specifically to write...

[Obbl]

Then have them do something really dumb/trivial/pointless/silly. Characters grow when they do things we connect with but in their own way, and when you're not worrying about the plot as much as the characters, you can have more fun writing it

[Douglas Collier]

Have him play D&D with a collie.

[Buster]

"Ugh... this is ridiculous..." Joel groaned, his head flopping onto the text book he had been studying. looking to the side, he double checked his notes from the day's lecture. Maybe he'd copied something down wrong... as he looked over the chicken scratch he called notes his attention kept getting drawn to the drawings in the margin. His character from last week's session, a Hound Archon blackguard. A brown and white face sticking out from a mass of badly drawn black and crimson armor. It was still hard to place where he had gotten the idea for the design, or the character. Still, It had been a fun change of pace to start a villains campaign, and while bringing bishop along had been a gamble, it had turned out rather well. Who knew the little guy was that into D&D?

He was getting distracted again. This test was important. Challenging for a few of his credits was risky, but then so had been leaving home, so had been taking bishop in, and pretty much every time they went to do anything was a risk... Glancing over his shoulder, he could see the dog curled up on the other bed his non-existent roommate would have had were there one. Though, in a way, technically he did have one. No risk, no reward. Shaving any amount of time off the course is worth it, if it leads to having a real home for him sooner. Even if it does mean I'll be playing catch-up next year.

"noffair sis... putt't bak..." Bishop grumbled, his words distorted by the cushion his muzzle was burred beneath. Joel had to try his hardest to keep from laughing at the sight, his attempts morphing into a yawn instead.

Maybe bishop had the right idea. some sleep might help.

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"Why is there a club if there's only six pets that showed up? and why is one a cat, I thought you said this was for dogs?" Ripley blurted out the minute she was through the door. The husky pup who had let her in just rolling his eyes, the rest of his expression unreadable with his muzzle hidden.

"More will show up. You'll see." Stated the other dog in front of her, the one who had invited her to join. He stood there glaring at her, before grumbling, "I... can't get rid of Tape."
"It's Grape, stupid!"
"Whatever! Anyway, Fox won't help cause he keeps saying he 'owes' that cat or something." He complained, arms crossed and glaring across the room at the kitten who was currently raiding the snacks and chatting with a brown pup. Ripley just started giggling.

"Hey! It's not funny! Quit laughing!"

[Czukay]

Good job! Keep it up!

[Amazee Dayzee]

Really think that this part of the story is really good! Great job!

[Buster]

bah... i'm still stuck on this part, i don't know what to write for his Universiy years, but i don't want to skip ahead to arriving in babylon gardens yet.

[Amazee Dayzee]

Well just take your time and eventually something will come to you.

[Buster]

I want to scrap this fic and start over. I didn't think this through.
I set it way too early in the time line and it's causing too many headaches. I'm already getting stuck and the main arc hasn't even started yet.

His distrust of animals isn't the only focal point his past could hinge on, i'll just use a different one. one closer to the present. maybe whatever event gave him a criminal record the first time, or the day he was recruited into peta.

[Amazee Dayzee]

Well whatever you decide just know that we will support you.

[Obbl]

Would you be able to do a time skip here, or have you written yourself into such a corner that events just can't line up in the timeline no matter how much fiddle-faddling you do?

[Buster]

no, i can't timeskip through this part because i need to set up the effect joel bishop and ripley are having on the timeline (they're not supposed to be here either) and set up the dynamic between bishop and joel. but i can't do that when they've been together for a while because they should already be used to eachother by that point.

not to mention Sabrina's subplot needs to kick off before he gets there or THAT'll make no sense continuity wise, which in turn means problems for Max, Snowball, Grape, Peanut, Ripley, and Tarot's parts of the main plot. without which, joel's thinking babylon gardens feels off when he gets there comes out of left field and doesn't add up.but she's not even there yet, she's still in africa and i can't do anything with her for a while yet.

the biggest problem is i never should have set that part of the story in a university, because i have no idea what that's like. i took a 2-year animation course (which didn't count for anything because i picked a bad school and didn't spend enough time on portfolio pieces to make up the difference >.< but i'm getting off topic), most of which i spent drawing animation frames or avoiding my creepy-as-hell roommate. i never actually went to a 'proper' college. it's not the same experience, and i don't know how to work around that.

[Amazee Dayzee]

Well like I said, just do whatever you feel like you need to and we will all be here supporting you in this story!