"The Bad Translator" Thread

[Tattorack]

Bing comes clean:

Er... Is Bing threatening me??? *hides*

+35

It has. * Bing * threats * free

Stop threatening!

+35

In order to avoid

Violence! Man! In order to avoid violence!!!

[VEB152]

Bing is quite nice at fulfilling your demands when asked properly.

"I'm bored. Entertain me."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"I am very tired, the framework decision has been adopted, and I think my head is on fire."

*pours a bucket of water over the head*

Also, turning random language order off gave me also quite interesting phrase:

"There are a lot of tired and have fun!"

Sounds like higher maths lecture

[Render]

"Three Rings for the Elven kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men, doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his Dark Throne,
In the land of Mordor where the shadows lie,"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"A resident of heaven and the King. 7-2. men, women and children and young people, as well as black magic, the Dark Lord is dead."

Men, women and children and young people? Ok...
In a 2nd translation I got "This is no new tree in sky solar maximum surface area of the bar or not underestimate Kedainiai."

"One Ring to rule them all,
One Ring to find them,
One ring to bring them all,
And in the darkness bind them."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"... Gold rings, dealing with dark circles."

Does the translater know what it is doing? This is SO true...

"Does the translater know what it is doing?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"You know that your translations"

[ArcFlight]

No ideas, so random Wikipedia time. Oh, let's try that first.

"No ideas, so random Wikipedia time."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"The idea, incidentally, from Wikipedia."

The Wolf and the Fox - Brothers Grimm

"A wolf and a fox once lived together. The fox, who was the weaker of the two, had to do all the hard work, which made him anxious to leave his companion."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Wolf chairs with adjustable focus, Fox, there are two."

"There are over 20,000 Grade II* listed buildings in England. This page is a list of these buildings in the district of West Devon in Devon."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"200,000 grant, Germany Xidewen (II), the United States and this Web site."

The process spat out a lot of different countries.

Bino's cast page.

"He’s envious, greedy, stingy, obnoxious, petty, and downright mean, and if you know a little something about dogs, that can rub off rather easily."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Disclosure of software and will be removed with envy dogs nº א based on a clock."

[Hlaoroo]

Code: Select all

"Sunny days sweeping the clouds away, on my way to where the air is sweet. Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"The sky is not a very nice site. Can you tell me? My bird?"

Code: Select all

"Some nights I stay up cashing in my bad luck Some nights I call it a draw Some nights I wish that my lips could build a castle Some nights I wish they'd just fall off"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Golf day and night. In the evening, some errors and changes."

What does golf have to do with anything?

Code: Select all

"You put your right hand in You put your right hand out You put your right hand in and you shake it all about. You do the Hokey Pokey And you turn around That's what it's all about!"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Well, then. For more information about Lithuanian hockey."

"Anatomy of domestic animals"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"How to make a little Anatomy"

So that's what my textbook is about!

Code: Select all

"Anatomy of domestic animals"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Animal anatomy"

Ah, you've got it right now, bing.

Code: Select all

"Anatomy of domestic animals"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Party costumes"

And... Oh so wrong!

[Render]

Code: Select all

"Anatomy of domestic animals"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Party costumes"

And... Oh so wrong!

That sounds like one of Joey's books.


This is the link-text, in some way it is fully OK.

"Click here to Jata Sergeant Ralph for Fido, Sabrina!"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Dance leader Ralph Zhongshisabulin, please click here."

"Gra-ape! The Wii remote is out of batteries, mom and dad are out of the house and I'm bored."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Transparency and the Church, his father, mother, and Wii game consoles and a bit tedious."

[Tattorack]

Lets sing a song!

So bye-bye, Miss American Pie
Drove my Chevy to the levee, but the levee was dry
And them good old boys were drinkin' whiskey and rye Singin'
"This'll be the day that I die This'll be the day that I die"

+35

Los Angeles whisky waste of young people around. The song is now a Chevrolet, in my life.

Guess somebody is depressed...

[Render]

Hey Halfwit, funny...

"If you don't want to call me Halfwit, call me Welshie! "

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Welsh idiot, if he can get up."

And Hukley, I couldn't resist...

[Render]

Found a new gadget for me...

"I'm presently trying the google translation plugin. hope it works fine for me."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

1st try: "Google Translator plugin is a good thing, I think."
2nd attempt: Try Google translate plugin."
3rd translation: "I tried Google translate plugin."

It looks like Bing likes it.

[Tattorack]

It looks like Bing likes it.[/color]

Maybe it wants to be taken out of its misery, oh wait, lets ask it:

Hey Bing, you feeling alright?

+35

Why the ice?

Uuuuuuuuuuuuuh ok?

Why the ice?

+35

Why should you be concerned?

[VEB152]

Probably just tripped and hurt itself. Hence the ice, to reduce the bruise or something.

Or maybe Bing's going mental again, and needs help.

"Did you take your pills?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Relaxation and well-being"

I won't mind some of the latter

[Tattorack]

Why the ice?

+35

Why should you be concerned?

Because we're kinda concerned dude!

+35

... This is a cause for concern.

Yes! Yes it is!

+35

Well, of course.

Well are you going to do something about it??

+35

... You don't need to do this.

Yes I do! We CARE about you!

+35

I love you too.

Aaawww

[Render]

"It is incredible how good a conversation works with a machine that only translates."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Good job to follow in the tradition of College."

"You have been at College?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"What is a school?"

"Ah, now you are back to normal. We were already worried about you."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"It will rotate usually can be found here."

[Tattorack]

It appears you have some trouble with puctuation.

+35

Boktoishan, obvious problems, in whole or in part.

Ok, thats a little better, but now you're not making much sense; Whos is Boktoishan?

+35

Very well, but now I know that this is not so, Boktoishan.

You haven't answered my question... Are you talking to somebody else?

+35

... No, it's going to have to answer questions about the story.

A right, ok; its a story you want to talk about? And that guy you mentioned is the auther?

+35

The problem we are the rules, and the day and night.

Having a kind of God complex are we?

+35

God complex

Yeah... thats what I said...

[ShadowLightning]

Original text:

"The zombies are coming! Quick! Get to the chopper!"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"You can use the zombie? Ingredient, helicopters, food"


Original text:

"The boat is sinking. Let's all evacuate in a calm and orderly fashio- yeah we're all gonna die. "

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Behind the scenes of the Olympics is good."


Original text:

"The government is out to get us. Their spying on us right now. "

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Espion."

Original text:

"Do not trust someone with a big butt. "

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"I think there is no shaft."


...I don't know how I feel about this. But I like it.

[Tattorack]

...I don't know how I feel about this. But I like it.

+35

... But I think she enjoyed it

o.o uuuhhh.....
Hé heh heh heh ^^;

[Render]

Let's check Bing's opinion about Minecraft:

"Would you mind to translate Minecraft.net for us?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Minecraft.NET, may be sent to you."

"Minecraft is a game about breaking and placing blocks. At first, people built structures to protect against nocturnal monsters, but as the game grew players worked together to create wonderful, imaginative things."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Minecraf is a good game for us, for the first time, to protect the reputation of the games continues to be acteur.j. (j) to work together."

"It can also be about adventuring with friends or watching the sun rise over a blocky ocean. It’s pretty. Brave players battle terrible things in The Nether, which is more scary than pretty."
"You can also visit a land of mushrooms if it sounds more like your cup of tea."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"... You and your friends small nozzle spiral vector stimulates more of the bad guys while playing."
"Of the two sports cars to see mushrooms, which I like."

"You can buy Minecraft for PC/Mac. Minecraft: Pocket Edition is available for iOS and Android, and Minecraft: Xbox 360 Edition is available on the XBLA Marketplace. So far 12,635,487 people bought the PC/Mac version of the game. Phew. "

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Minecraf Minecraf computer can be bored! : 2 free packages, medicine, pharmacy, IOS and Android version for Xbox 360: Minecraf. in 12 games, 494 XBL-635, buy the PC version. The investigation of the President."

"The investigation of the President."

[Render]

So many questions...

"Will the wolfs be able to win against Jata? Will anybody react on Ralph's attempt to stop the fight? Will Tattorack continue to translate the Comics?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Wolf hunting cartoon, Ralph and tatorak."

[UT Mike 97]

Original text:

"Where's Waldo?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"If you want to know more about her aunt."

[Saturn381]

Original text:

"I'm going to the market."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"On the market."

[ArcFlight]

Run out of ideas, so, quick brown fox.

"The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Sofa, was satisfied."

[Saturn381]

Original text:

"Can I have some pasta?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"In Italy is a CD."

[ArcFlight]

Random quotes.

H.G. Wells:
"Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe."
...35 translations later, Bing gives us:
"In the history of humanity will be destroyed."

Ludwig Wittgenstein:
"If people never did silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done."
...35 translations later, Bing gives us:
"Little smart history"


Jean Jacques Rousseau:
"He who is slowest in making a promise is most faithful in its performance. "
...35 translations later, Bing gives us:
"The output is low."

Benjamin Disraeli:
"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me."
...35 translations later, Bing gives us:
"Very happy and eat partridges"

Ellen DeGeneres:
"Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when they are wearing dark glasses and have streamers in their antlers because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot."
...35 translations later, Bing gives us:
"Very easy and efficient glass wall more Horn-Defand, you know?"

Jane Goodall:
"I wanted to talk to the animals like Dr. Doolittle."
...35 translations later, Bing gives us:
"P a little more and four other countries Doolittl cities around the world."

[Tattorack]

Remember rule number 66!! The cake is a LIE!!

+35

66? But the cake is too big for a lie!

Stay away from it!! Stay away I say!!

+35

Anna is not much better.

But at least she is real!

+35

... But a little lesson.

Yeah! I'm giving you one! You stay away from that cake-lie or I burn your toes off! Its for your own good!

+35

So, the more powerful the tooth Jukebox Borino f, so good.

Too late

[Saturn381]

Original text:

"Where's the nearest restroom?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Then I will go."

[Render]

"I shouldn't drink while reading this ridiculous translations"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Pot, wine etc. If you can read the strange habit."

"Do you translate with 'Random Language Order' selected or unselected?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Naklj Enizbran Titikni in Czechoslovakia"

[VEB152]

Okay, now that, Render, needs investigating! Let me try...

"You like mentioning former socialist countries, don't you?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"It's not the same old Mintionir in a socialist country?"

"Who is that Mintionir character?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Mintionir."

...I am missing on some piece of common knowledge or what?

[Tattorack]

In all of google "Mintionir" got only one result. Who or what the devil is it???

+35

I usually just Google Mintionir and why

What? Just for the heck of it?

+35

Why would you want to? ILKKA.

That's what I meant to ask you. And it's Tattorack please, thank you.

+35

Do you want to hear. Please thank your Tatorak.

Can't spell my web-name properly

[Render]

"Why can't you just keep Tattorack as it is instead making Tatorak out of it?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Tattorack 。 Tatorak 。"

"OK, you can keep the name as you just proved. But what do you want to say with this?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"... Me Tokirid."

"Do I understand that correctly? Your name is Tokirid? I always thought you were Bing."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Much? My name is Tokirid, I believe."

OK, this seems to be very clear now.

[kurowolfe]

"So your name now is Tokirid, Bing?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Tokirid Bing now"

Err...

"You have a split personality, my friend."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"... Public function."

... I see

[Render]

"Let's skip the part with your name. Tell us where you come from? Which country or at least which continent?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"No vote: for example. The smallest continent."

"The smallest continent? You mean Australia? I'm not sure, if Hlaoroo would be very proud of that fact."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Australian mainland criminals? Well, Sarah is proud of."

"Och come on. Yes, the British have shipped their prisoners to Australia. But that was a very long time ago. Don't expect the average Aussi to be a criminal."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"... And although I wouldn't say that. After a long period of water, Finland, Italy and in jail. Wait for your safety."

"How long is a long period of Finland? And what is the meaning of it? Sometimes I really have problems to understand what you mean..."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"In Finland? I think they are just words, and sometimes white."

"OK, I just pretend to have asked the Oracle of Delphi."

...9 translations later, TransPerfect gives us:

"Bakr mn profecas uzlatrmak eby yararn iindeki Delfi. "

BAMMM HEADSHOT!!!

[Render]

Just took the text from the Favorite _____ Game. Let's see where it takes us to:

"I can't say that I have a favorite cat name. Maybe very simple, the german word for cat, Katze. Wasn't the name of Colombo's dog simply Dog?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Type a name for the selected items. In General. Female puppy names and dog Germany Katz"

"The cat that lives with my Father was named Tom by my mother. But the cat was not paying attention to the name and gave birth to 4 kittens when she was nearly one year old. If my mom only would have asked somebody to check the sex..."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

1st try: "My mother and my father is still alive. Cat trays 2-4, Keith Thomas, people used to ask my mother."
2nd try: "The mother or father. the 4-year-old daughter cats have found a person who from time to time, if a parent decorator:"

"But the cat is still Tom and she's coming home if called Tom Tom (when she hears it)."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"But it's not always at home Tangmutangm (Eve)"

"If I would ever have a purple cat, you know... "

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Purple cat?"

"Yes, purple cat. Her name is Grape Jelly Sandwich. Don't tell me you never heard of Housepets!. "

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Well, the cat, the name of the wine. I think you should know that listening to the animals."

[hypernovatic]

Original text:

"There are better places to sleep then on the ground you know."
...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"This is a good place to stay."

Original text:

"I like shorts. They're comfy and easy to wear."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"The Shortest."

[Render]

I tried something...

"Mal sehen, was passiert, wenn man einen Text auf deutsch eingibt."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Germany, as everyone Aingib President Bashar vocabulary."

"Das ist ja interessant. Wer ist Präsident Bashar? Von welchem Land ist er denn Präsident?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"As a matter of interest the citizens Bashar Al-Assad, hospital public relations at the hospital."

"Es klappt deutlich besser, als ich es erwartet habe. Viele Sachen werden scheinbar in den unterschiedlichsten Sprachen einfach so übersetzt."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"The cable is a problem, of course, there are thousands of kids and a large number of countries."

Everything is perfectly translated, so I dont think put it here in english, it's not needed.

OK... if you like, here the translations:
- Let's try what happens if you insert a text in german.
- That's interesting. Who is president Bashar? Of which country is he the president?
- It's working much better then expected by me. Apparently many things are simply translated in the various languages.


It seems that Tattorack isn't translating the comics for us, so I started:

[Tattorack]

I tried something...

"Mal sehen, was passiert, wenn man einen Text auf deutsch eingibt."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Germany, as everyone Aingib President Bashar vocabulary."

"Das ist ja interessant. Wer ist Präsident Bashar? Von welchem Land ist er denn Präsident?"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"As a matter of interest the citizens Bashar Al-Assad, hospital public relations at the hospital."

"Es klappt deutlich besser, als ich es erwartet habe. Viele Sachen werden scheinbar in den unterschiedlichsten Sprachen einfach so übersetzt."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"The cable is a problem, of course, there are thousands of kids and a large number of countries."

Everything is perfectly translated, so I dont think put it here in english, it's not needed.

OK... if you like, here the translations:
- Let's try what happens if you insert a text in german.
- That's interesting. Who is president Bashar? Of which country is he the president?
- It's working much better then expected by me. Apparently many things are simply translated in the various languages.


It seems that Tattorack isn't translating the comics for us, so I started:

What? Yes I am! o_o
Its here: http://www.housepetscomic.com/forums/vi ... f=6&t=2690

[Render]

What? Yes I am! o_o
Its here: http://www.housepetscomic.com/forums/vi ... f=6&t=2690

I thought you didn't want to put it in the translation-section... I was looking under 'The Comic' every day...
Ah, Kitch moved it...

But anyway I also did the other two comics already, here they are:

[Render]

I'm just working on this strip and wonder about the translator....... (more than usual!)

Got this in the middle of a translation:

Code: Select all

Back to English: You will be four hundred and fifty dollars
To Haitian Creole: N' a trèz dola
Back to English: You will thirteen dollars

There were huge exchange losses during the translation.


I needed to restart the translation as I only got "" as final result, so don't wonder later on. But I wanted to share this.

[Saturn381]

Original text:

"Power Rangers"

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Power Rangers gambling problem."

[Render]

That also works the other way around:

"Power Rangers gambling problem."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"Power Rangers"

[hypernovatic]

Original text:

"I killed Pikachu."

...35 translations later, Bing gives us:

"... Kill The Batman"
Wow.